Is it good to be content?

Of all our farm cats, this guy is probably the most content. He spends most of the day sleeping, draped across the railing of our deck, or on the seat of my swing. All the same, as soon as there is any sound or movement, he is instantly awake and checking things out. Wouldn't it be nice if we could all achieve perfect relaxation and then be 100% "on" and focused when we need to be?

All of my life I have been a "doer", an achievement-oriented person, constantly thinking and in motion. From the time I was a child, being raised in the intensity of our work ethic on the farm, I soon learned that my greatest value was when I was working, contributing, and accomplishing things. I've also been driven by the need to create and experience the joy of creation. I love the tangible evidence of my thoughts, knowing that my creations are the embodiment of my ideas that now exist independent of me. 

I am only lately beginning to realize the value of just "being" as well as "doing".  There is satisfaction in existing as well as producing. I like to take a few moments out of the day to just be still, empty my mind, become aware of things both inside and outside of myself. There is joy in that kind of "in the moment" contentment. It's like a mini mental and physical renewal. Then I can get back to my creating with more energy and focus! 

 

Perfection is an Illusion

 

I inherited this 1937 Eaton Beauty doll from my aunt. She's just perfect, isn't she? In fact, she's not. She's in great shape, but like everything else, time has taken its toll. If you look carefully you can see she has a small chip and a crack on the left corner of her mouth.

I'm sure the day Aunt Ruth received her, she seemed absolutely perfect. But even then she wasn't really. No matter how well she was made, I'm sure a close examination would have revealed small irregularities here or there. Since that time she has undergone many changes, including a whole new set of clothes. In the world of antiques, all of these would work together to make her less desirable, but not to me. To me she is perfect because of her imperfections, because of the experiences she has encountered and survived. 

As a classroom teacher, I often had children make what they considered to be irreparable mistakes on a painting in art class and want to throw out the whole thing and start again. Part of working with art is learning how to take an error and and make it into something unique, interesting and perhaps even extraordinary. The original mistake can take the painting in a whole new direction and perhaps help it become  even more fascinating. It all depends on how you look at it.

Sometimes we can just get too detail-oriented, bringing everything, including ourselves, unrelentingly under the microscope, hyper-focused on exposing every tiny imperfection. When we do this, we lose sight of the larger picture and torture ourselves unnecessarily. Perhaps even worse is when we turn the microscope on others, judging them continuously for small flaws which we look for and inevitably find. 

Life is full of glorious imperfections that add beauty and interest to everything we see, both in the natural world and in the people around us. We need to learn to love the imperfections, even in ourselves! 

As a reader and a writer, there is nothing more annoying than a "perfect" character. A perfect character can't learn, grow or change. As a writer there's really no place to go with them, except to expose them to experiences which make them more human.

In short, perfection is a fleeting moment at best and almost always an illusion.

 

What About Heroes?

 With all of the anger, violence and desecration of public property over the last few months, I've been thinking a lot about heroes.

What is a hero? Google defines a hero as a person who is admired or idealized for courage, outstanding achievements or noble qualities.

As a writer of children's historical fiction, heroes are part of my everyday work. From a writer's point of view, even an extraordinary hero needs to be believable. While a hero can be courageous, accomplish amazing tasks and display a firmness of character that is truly admirable, that character must also show vulnerability. Perhaps they have doubts or weaknesses with which they struggle and which impede their progress towards goals. Man's struggle with himself is a major theme in literary works throughout time. A perfect hero is not believable. We cannot identify with such a person. They cannot inspire us to greater heights.

Perhaps part of the problem is with the word "idealize". To idealize someone is to regard them as being perfect or better than they actually are. We have made them bigger than life. In past times, there was a lot of idealizing of public historical figures. When people are idealized, it is only a matter of time before the truth is revealed and our admiration not only wanes, but plummets and anger and cynicism sets in. 

Another important point is that to understand someone from the past, we need to understand them within their own historical context. To judge someone from another culture or time based on our own contextual beliefs and values is shortsighted and unfair.

Take my great great grandmother Mary Ann, for instance. She and her brother left their home in England to emigrate to the western United States, when she was twenty and he was eighteen. They arrived safely in America, but her brother died of mountain fever during their overland travel by ox team. Upon arriving at their destination, Mary Ann found herself completely alone. She married a man she barely knew and they had thirteen children. At age thirty, Mary Ann lost her vision. She never saw eight of her children. To make matters more difficult, she was left a widow at age forty-five when several of her children were still young. Somehow she managed.

Mary Ann's daughter, Eliza, my great grandmother, emigrated to Canada. When Eliza's husband died, Mary Ann rode a train, blind and unaided, all the way to Canada, to stay with Eliza and help her for a year following her husband's death.Was she extraordinary or was she crazy? That depends on how you look at it. If you judge her by today's standards, she made many decisions that we might not make. For example, why would you have eight more children after you were blind? If you look at her life within her own context, she did hard things because she had to do them and displayed great courage by going going beyond to do hard things she didn't have to do.

It's unfortunate that all I have are stories about her, but nothing in her own words. I value diaries and journals written by people from the past because that is the only way to truly see into their world and understand their perspectives and motivations. 

So while we're crashing, burning and discarding these heroes from the past we should ask ourselves a few questions. Were they admirable within their own time and context? Did they exalt themselves or who was it that idealized them? When we disregard them as unfitting role models for today, was there anything they should be remembered for or are we casting them aside completely, without giving credit where credit is due? And lastly, what does it mean to live in a world without heroes?        

Dealing with the Immensity

This photo was one of our first sights of Australia a few years ago. It was one of those times when I looked out and was completely overwhelmed by what I saw.

Looking out at life and feeling overwhelmed is a frequent thing for me. While the vista may be stunning, it can also be frightening and just a little too much to take in. Over the years I've learned some coping strategies I thought I'd share. 

My first  strategy, when I'm too close to the edge, is to just step back and breathe. I just take a minute to look away and get my balance.

The second thing I do is break it down. When I was a kid I remember a little poem that went like this:

Little drops of water

Little grains of sand

Make the might ocean

And the pleasant land.

( Julia Abigail Fletcher Carney) 

It really helps me to break the whole picture down into little pieces, Then I can manage and narrow my focus. There are two questions I ask myself:

"What's most important?" and "What's next?"

When I was a school administrator, I had a notebook with a page, or sometimes two, for each day. I divided it into at least four quadrants. One was simply my schedule. Another quadrant was a list for the classroom, the third a list for the office and the fourth, a list for home and family. In that way I was able to keep a lot of balls in the air at once.

Now I'm retired, I still have a lot of things I want to accomplish and find I need structure in my day. I've started making a goal sheet for the week. It's divided into the different areas in which I want or need to work. Each area has a list of things I'd like to accomplish that week. The thing I like about this is that it gives me flexibility within the structure. Some things still have a deadline or an urgency, but others are choices I can make depending on where I want to focus my energy. At the end of the day or the week, I have a feeling of accomplishment when I can check things off that are done and see that I'm actually making progress, even when it's slow.

What this beautiful photo off the coast of Australia doesn't show is the hordes of little black flies that enveloped us as soon as we stepped out of our vehicle. They were incredibly annoying and made it hard to focus on the view. That's the other thing I struggle with sometimes, the myriad little distractions that get in the way of my goals. Over the years I've learned to sift through those as well. 

If the distractions are people, they're important. Sometimes I just have to set my work aside and give my time and attention to some else. If they are simply distractions, I find ways to shut them down and out. Every once in a while it's nice to relax and choose to be distracted by something that's just simply enjoyable. 

Do you have any strategies you use when feeling over the top? I'm always interested in new ideas!

 

Happy 115th Birthday, Alberta!

 

On September 1, 1905, Alberta officially became a Canadian province. In fact, both Alberta and Saskatchewan became provinces that day. Prior to that they were both sections of the Northwest Territories and their flag was the flag of the Hudson's Bay Company. 

In Alberta, the ceremony was held at noon and George Hedley Vicars Bulyea was appointed as the Lieutenant Governor.

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Alberta was named for Princess Louise Caroline Alberta, the fourth daughter of Queen Victoria. Princess Louise's husband, the Marquess of Lorne, served as the Governor General of Canada from 1878-1883.The name was given in 1882 when Alberta became a provisional district of the Northwest Territories and remained the name when it became a province. Lake Louise in Banff was also named for this princess. 

Alberta didn't get its own official flag until June 1, 1968. The flag was adopted for use as a centennial banner in 1967 and then voted to be the official flag by the Alberta Legislature the following year. 

The wild rose was adopted as Alberta's official flower in 1930. 

The road from Windy Rafters Barn to the main Orton Road is dotted by wild roses in June. This year was especially beautiful with the rain we received. Perhaps we should call it Wild Rose Drive!